Who Is Using Chemtrails to Bring Back Unicorns & Why?

Behind every myth and every conspiracy theory there is a truth.

The tales of unicorns are not just fabrications. They are faded memories of a time far in the past; a time when unicorns and humans shared a far more magical world.

However over time the conditions which supported unicorns changed. The environmental factors which unicorns exist and thrive in were altered, and with the loss of a favorable habitat, the unicorns disappeared.

So what changed?


During the time when unicorns and humans shared the world, rainbows were a regular occurrence. Conditions in the sky were such that on most days a rainbow could be seen from anywhere. It was this atmosphere that the magical horned creature thrived.

And then came a terrible sorcerer who changed things forever. Using his reason sorcery he decided that since the sky was of a single substance, it should be a single color, and not littered with all these damn rainbows. The terrible reason sorcerer had been right about a few things before and the people came to believe him unconditionally, even though he had also been wrong on many other occasions. So when the word spread of his discovery, the people began to question the very existence of rainbows entirely. And as their disbelief spread, the rainbows began to fade away.

The unicorns had tried to warn the humans, but the humans could not be bothered with something like unicorns when reason was at stake. Reason, they reasoned, must not be ignored at the expense of reason! And so just as the rainbows went away, so did the unicorns.

From wherever that foul sorcery has segregated them, they still try to reach out to us on occasion with a rainbow to remind us of the world before reason had reduced our perception of the sky to nothing more than a collection of clockwork objects.

Today unicorns are needed more than ever, and therefore, so are rainbows. When experts uncovered this shocking truth they scrambled for a solution. At first they experimented with the same holographic technology used to make planes appear on 9/11. Yet this failed to attract any unicorns out from that nether realm. It was surmised that fake rainbows could not entice real unicorns, and so holograms would not work.

And so they set their sites on creating real rainbows and discovered that leaving trace elements in the atmosphere could cause reflection phenomena and potentially create the real thing. However they decided not to tell the people what they were doing, because they didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up.

As a consequence all kinds of people came to believe that these strange new chemtrails now appearing regularly in the skies held some nefarious purpose. Conspiracy theories were hatched and fear and alarm went up.

Fear and alarm were what the people were experiencing when the rainbows and unicorns first disappeared. Because the reason sorcery provided such a great illusion, it allowed them to become certain about things which they never even thought they needed to be certain about before. When you are certain about things, there are all kinds of reasons to be afraid.

Unfortunately just not things like having your rainbows go away, and with them the only friends you have to remind you that true magic can live and thrive if only you believe.

Do not fear the chemtrails, my friends, for such is the salvation of the unicorns and the way back to a world in which the possibility of magic outweighs the certainty of reason.

Credit for the initial idea for this story goes to my brother Jamie Hotchkin.


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